Childish

“Silent sea, tell this to me: Where are the children that we used to be?”

“At picture shows where nobody goes and only the heart can see.”

-Dan Fogelburg

I have to admit that I’m still childish. 

I work hard, I’m married and have kids and somehow I’m raising these kids.  Maybe my wife is really raising them behind my back, because I don’t know that I’m ready to be a grown up yet.

It’s not that I’m impolite or careless.  But I choose to live my life in a way that is full of childish assumptions.

I believe that being nice to people is the way to go.  I think that compassion and kindness, especially to those in need, is the best thing for everyone.  For me and for the people I’m being kind to.  I think that being kind is better protection than carrying a gun.

I think that if we work hard, we can do whatever we want.  I don’t think we can all be NBA stars, but I think we could all play basketball well, even if we’re in a wheelchair.  I believe that if we want to be a writer, an artist, a politician, a professor, a video game programmer… whatever… we can do it.  Especially if we aren’t looking to be paid for our work.

I believe that studying and reading will still get me ahead in life.  Although I’m 48, if I read a book  on the bus, people ask me if I’m a student, because only a student must read the tomes I do.  No, I read these tomes because I think that I can help myself, my family and others whom I know if I read them. 

I think that people can still marry for life and love for life.  My wife and I are still novices at it, only being married 24 years, but we think we can go the distance.  And I think we can all do it, if we really put our minds to it, really listen and really care.

I believe that my Daddy will take care of me.  My human dad is great, but I’ve found that my heavenly Daddy is better at taking care of me when I’m in trouble.  Because of that, I can step out and take some chances that other people wouldn’t, knowing that my Daddy’s got my back.  Like giving everything I have to the poor and having homeless folks stay in my house with my family and I.

There are many childish beliefs I have done away with:

I don’t believe that we can always see the good in doing good.  But I believe that if I obey the good I will be rewarded.

I don’t believe that there are good guys and bad guys.  But I believe that people who act bad can become good.

I don't believe that we can live without mistakes, but I believe we can live without compromise to hate or greed.

I don’t believe that the police are here to protect me.  But I believe that I am protected.

I don’t think that me being nice means that others will be nice to me.  But I think that being nice is good in and of itself.

I don’t  believe that reasoning by itself convinces anyone of anything.  But I believe that following my convictions is essential, no matter what anyone else says.

I don’t believe that I’m right all the time.  But I do believe that love is always right.

I don’t hope in my government, in getting a job, in other people, in my family, in my political ideals, or in anything on earth.  But I do believe that there is reason to hope, despite how pointless it all seems.

Some think I’m cynical.  

Rather, I have given up on being grown up.  

I’ll stick with being childish.  It seems to work for me.