So here are some of my own thoughts, which I hope work toward building a better world for women.
It amazes me how many people perpetuate the myths of rape. Assuming that someone is lying about sexual assault without evidence. Claiming that a woman “deserved it”. Thinking that the way a woman is dressed has anything to do with whether they deserve to be assaulted.
As men, we need to realize what the problems really are. First, it is the limiting of women to objects of our own enjoyment or pleasure. Of course, when our only relation to a human being is as an entertainer, then we can judge their performance as to whether they have given us something. But women in general are often treated as a male gaze display. Thus do men catcall and tell women to “smile” or advise them to dress better or to wear makeup. These are all indications of a context in which men see all women as on a stage for their own benefit, instead of equal human beings who are allowed to look as they wish, according to their own desires and goals. When that
Second, men consider their sexual satisfaction as something they “deserve,” and to not obtain that satisfaction is to suffer something unacceptable. Look guys, if you aren’t getting the sex you want, you have another option: jerk off. It may not be the first option, but it is better than driving oneself crazy failing to obtain the specific kind of satisfaction you choose. Women, whether individuals or in general, have no responsibility to make sure every man is satisfied. When a man thinks that their sexual pleasure is more important than respecting another human being, their priorities are screwed up.